AGENCY-GRADE CRYPTO TEMPLATES FOR PEOPLE WHO AREN'T PUSSIES
You want a $12,999 website but you're too cheap to pay for it?
Perfect. We stripped out the handholding and left the weapons.
Five templates. Five price points. Zero bullshit.
Pick one. Pay. Download. Build it yourself or die trying.
TRACKING PROGRESS TO MAXIMUM DEGENERACY
Every custom site sold becomes a template. Capped at 69 because it's porn.
VIEW THE 69 CLUB →REAL FEEDBACK FROM REAL DEGENERATES
"Bought template, still poor but website looks sick"
- xCryptoApe420
"Finally, a developer who gets it. No bullshit, just files."
- DiamondHandsDegen
"Cheaper than my therapist and more effective"
- RektByLuna
"Instructions unclear, but figured it out. WAGMI"
- AnonWhale
"Saved $10k on dev costs. Spent it on shitcoins instead."
- TemplateEnjoyer
"No customer support? Based. 10/10"
- SupportIsForPussies
DIYFS Bot: FIGURE IT OUT YOURSELF
Already sent crypto? Tell us so we can send your files.
TOP 10 DEGENERATES FROM THE ARCADE
THINK YOU CAN DO BETTER? PROVE IT
EXCLUSIVE NFTS FOR DEGENS ONLY
FREE*
Generate your own with DPG. *Minting costs extra when available.
CREATE NOW6.9 ETH
The original middle finger that started it all. Ultra rare. Only for true degens.
COMING SOON4.20 ETH
Watch your money burn in real-time. Animated flames included. Satisfaction not guaranteed.
COMING SOON13.37 ETH
To the moon or homeless. No in-between. Rocket fuel sold separately.
COMING SOON69.0 ETH
The ultimate flex. Wear the crown of the king himself. Peasants bow down.
COMING SOONWEAR YOUR DEGENERACY WITH PRIDE
$42
Premium cotton. Angrier than your portfolio. Makes normies uncomfortable.
$84
For cold nights watching charts. Cry into the hood. Premium comfort.
$12
Slap them on your laptop. Let everyone know you're NGMI. 10 pack.
$35
Hide your balding from stress trading. Snapback. One size fits most.
$42-84
Generate your own degen design. Print on anything. Maximum shame.
TONO IX TOKEN BLUEPRINT
69,000,000,000,000
69 TRILLION — BECAUSE SUBTLETY IS FOR BITCHES
| CATEGORY | % | AMOUNT | NOTES |
|---|---|---|---|
| Mr. Barrio Wallet | 25% | 17,250,000,000,000 | Non-negotiable. King holds the crown. |
| Marketing + PR Wallet | 15% | 10,350,000,000,000 | Meme raids, listings, and brutal ad campaigns. |
| Growth & Dev Wallet | 10% | 6,900,000,000,000 | Site hosting, token integrations, arcade builds. |
| Liquidity Pool | 35% | 24,150,000,000,000 | For DEX/CEX pairs. Locked like your ex's emotions. |
| Public Burn (Dead Wallet) | 15% | 10,350,000,000,000 | Forever gone. Like your last paycheck. |
DEPLOYED ON ETHEREUM (ERC-20)
"MrBarrio.eth owns 25% of the supply — publicly. Not to dump. To lead."
This is Web3 run like Tesla, not a rug.
✓ No hidden whales
✓ No ghost wallets
✓ No anonymous teams
✓ Just execution, ownership, and transparency
You're not betting on a pitch.
You're riding with the architect.
You found the secret, you beautiful bastard.
Use code KONAMICREW for 5% off
Only works if you pay with crypto
Been grinding since Dec 2023?
Living in airports?
Building empires from rental cars?
That's warrior shit.
Colombia's waiting.
Your future's loading.
Keep fucking going.
A SAVAGE PAC-MAN CLONE WHERE YOU COLLECT CRYPTO THAT HATES YOU
| 'fuckyou' | God Mode - Invincibility + Red Glow + Speed Boost |
| 'neon' | Psychedelic Mode - Rainbow Colors + Animated Background |
| 'rekt' | Burning Coins Mode - All Coins Have Flame Effects |
| 'moon' | Rocket Coins Mode - All Coins Become 🚀 |
| 'bear' | Bear Market - Enemies 50% Bigger + "BEAR" Label |
| 'root1337' | Fake Hack Message + Free 1337 Points |
| < 1,000 | Default Skin - Basic Middle Finger |
| 1,000+ | Silver - "STILL POOR BUT TRYING" |
| 10,000+ | Gold - "OKAY YOU'RE NOT USELESS" + Crown Pattern |
| 50,000+ | Diamond - "TOUCH GRASS" + Bling Pattern |
| WIX | Blue (#0066FF) | "TEMPLATE PEASANT" |
| SQSP | Black (#000000) | "BASIC BITCH" |
| GDDY | Teal (#00A4A6) | "PUSSY" |
| FVRR | Green (#1DBF73) | "$5 DEVELOPER" |
| CNVA | Cyan (#00C4CC) | "DRAG AND DROP LOSER" (Level 3+) |
| VITALIK | Purple (#9400D3) | Boss - Throws $200 Gas Fees |